Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category
Hello everyone, it’s been awhile; I am so so sorry for the silence here a lot has been happening in my life and I needed to take time out to get my balance right. I will try my best not to diappear again. 😊
So I thought maybe my comeback should be related to the season, I know! I know! What else can be said but please just hear me out. In this season we are reminded of the word Love! But what is Love? What do you understand by the word Love?
Do you really love someone? Then, let’s see how you act toward that person.
Love is more than attraction and more than arousal. It’s also more than sentimentality, like so many of today’s songs suggest. By this standard, is love dead when the emotion is gone? No, not at all. Because love is an action; love is a behavior.
Over and over again, in the Bible, God commands us to love each other. And you can’t command an emotion. If I told you “Be sad!” right now, you couldn’t be sad on cue. Just like an actor, you can fake it, but you’re not wired for your emotions to change on command.
If love were just an emotion, then God couldn’t command it. But love is something you do. It can produce emotion, but love is an action.
The Bible says, “Let us stop just saying we love each other; let us really show it by our actions.” (1 John 3:18 NLT) We can talk a good act: “I love people.” But do we really love them? Our love is revealed in how we act toward them. So based on just your actions do you truly Love the people around you. If words were to seize right now and all you had was your action could they tell that you Love them? The emotions you feel building up inside you is not love but a by product of your love action and behavior. #ChooseToLoveToday
Compliments of the Season!!!
Is Happiness A Decision Or A Feeling……?
“Most folks are as happy as they make up their mind to be.”
I asked this question on my show on radio today and was quite impressed with people’s response…. a lot of people were of the opinion that Happiness is a Decision… but then comes the question If its a decision why do we have more UN-happy people out there? Is it that they choose to be UN-happy? Let me start by saying; happiness is a phenomenon every human on this planet desires in their hearts. Yet most of us look for happiness in all the wrong places and end up causing ourselves more suffering. This is the case sadly, because we are looking outside of ourselves for some-thing or some-one to bring us Happiness.
A 13th-century Persian poet simply called Rumi once said; we go room to room looking for the diamond necklace around our neck. I totally agree with this saying, we search “everywhere” for happiness, and sadly; we never see where it really is, which is with us all along.
I think we all would agree that Happiness does not depend on material things, such as driving a certain car or owning a prestigious house. (although, such things can add pleasure to our life).
We have to take note that, happiness does not depend on what happens or on other people, like whether tou hve a significant other or not. (although, having loving and supportive people around does add to our enjoyment).
“Don’t wit around for other people to be happy for you. Any happiness you get you’ve got to make yourself.”
Sometimes people choose to wallow and take no responsibility for things… you can’t choose how you feel, but you can make choices to enhance your chance of feeling happy.
Happiness is not to be found anywhere in the external world.
Personally, I believe the main obstacle to happiness is our faulty thinking. For Instance thinking, Some-one or some-thing can make you happy, is faulty thinking. you have a choice, to be happy, but do you want to be If your answer is YES! Then its time you should decide to be.
I like to remind myself that I am the creator of my own thoughts and state of mind. It is my choice what feeling I choose to have on any given day. This does not mean I don’t go with the flow of feelings (Of course I do … I am no robot), but the fact that I can choose at any given moment to change what it is I desire…. is just re-assuring.
“Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.”
Sadly, a lot of us have learned to quietly accept whatever happens to us, without question, without standing up and saying ‘No!’ We have become passive, powerless and uninspired robots, going along with the crowd. It’s a sad state of affairs that we have been raised in. It seems somewhere along the line, a standard was laid out for us and we are ‘expected’ to magically meet this invisible ‘standard’ by compromising and living according to someone else’s perspectives… I ask you now…. Where is the happiness in that?
It is about time that we realise that we are empowered within us to choose our emotion, to choose how we respond or react to something, is all up to us. It is all choice!!!
So again I say… Choosing happiness is a choice.
Just take a minute to think about how you are feeling right now. How long has it been since you chose what you wanted to feel?
Now, I am not saying that you go into a state of denial if you are in one kind of trauma or another, but I am suggesting that you put in a new option for yourself. Instead of sitting in pain, decide for a few minutes that you will focus on happiness. Plus, it doesn’t hurt to try; because think about it would you rather go through life choosing happiness and drawing happy experiences to yourself, or would you rather just sit in pain and expect the worst, thereby feeling the worst?
So where can we find happiness?
I will tell you…. stop looking outside for what can only be found inside.
And make a decision to be happy.
I would like to formally invite you to be Happy!
Repeat the phrase below:
I, your name, decide to be happy right now, despite the state of the world, or what happens to me and around me.
I absolutely know it is my God-given birth right to be happy.
And as the light of God that i am, I reclaim happiness and happiness reclaims me.
Make the decision everyday to be happy!!!
“Happiness doesn’t depend on any external conditions; it is governed by our mental attitude.”
- Finding peace and happiness . (positive-thoughts.typepad.com)
- Happiness Quotes (us.coca-cola.com)
- What is better than happiness? (letyourselflearn.com)
- Thoughts on love… (danieloliech.wordpress.com)
WHO IS THAT SPECIAL PERSON?
Sometimes, when I hear the sound of a car slowing down am tempted to peek and check is that for me could someone have thought of me and even driven down just to check on me? I get excited at the thought, but as always the car slowing down to a halt is not for me…..thinking about it now I feel pathetic but that’s really how I feel, having to put up a strong face can be tiring but I have gone from putting up a strong face to really being strong……it’s just that in moments of loneliness you wish you had that special someone……I thought I had found my special some one quite recently…..a part of me screamed “the search is over he is here”….there was peace a very relaxing calm peace that I just can’t explain but it was there and it was quite reassuring…..it’s the reason I held on….for so long….only to have that door slammed ruthlessly in my face…….wow!!! Life is a very long journey with a lot of displeasing and uncomfortable turns……then, when Isaac Samuel Adekunle was in my life the sound of the car coming to a halt by my window was for me….and his visits would make the evenings feel complete and perfect….we would talk and laugh and feel good sharing our challenges …..at least that’s what it felt like for me…….sigh!!! I enjoyed it ….In fact I secretly wished it would never end…..but, it was never meant to be; for the one who led me on like we were something really special ….had other plans he had someone else on the side …..Someone he planned to marry…..and did not tell me until the day of the marriage……it still baffles me though. where did he find the time for her-he spent everyday with me…..where and how did she come into the picture….or was she always there and I was so stupid and naive not to have noticed?
…..I still remember how hard it was to breath when my phone beeped and full of excitement on seeing his name across my screen of my mobile phone…. I open the text message and the message read…. You did not congratulate me……. Today is my TRAD…….(Trad is short for traditional marriage)….I never thought an involuntary action such as breathing could become such a big laborious task. I had to struggle to get the right amount of air into my lungs cause it felt like my system was shutting down and from the corner of my eyes darkness was creeping in……I steadied myself holding on to the counter in the kitchen saying it was a joke….”I just spoke to him two days ago we spoke for almost an hour, he said nothing about a trad…..it cant be what I think it is, he probably meant to say he was at a trad and it was a typo”……I tried calling, but he wouldn’t pick up and then my phone beeps again……another message ……”I can’t talk now”…….confusion pretty much set in at this point in my already muddled up mind……so I asked the dreaded question in the form of a text I said to him ….”Are you saying today is your traditional wedding?” To which he answered simply……”yes!” Then, he tries to make it light by saying he told me….which just threw me off the edge because right now another lie is not what I need ….then my brother sees traditional wedding photos on his blackberry phone……..that cleared all my doubts “so it true my supposed special person went on with someone else……I wasn’t special after all. I was just statistics to him”…..that hurt even more……I felt hurt, broken and betrayed on top of everything…..he wasn’t who he portrayed himself to be. I asked myself over and over was there ever a sign? Did I overlook something? Well, now that I have had time to think about it….yes I over looked a few important things……
1- First, never give people a clean slate when first you meet them, they all have a past and you cannot go on with them like they never did….their stories give you an inkling into the kind of person you are about to let into you life.
2- Don’t be in a rush to get too familiar, most of the time when we get too comfortable we get blind sided to a lot of warning signs….which reveal themselves with time.
3- Note that, his action and his words are two different things….in a man’s world words are a strong indication of his true intentions……if he does not verbally define what you both have don’t assume it’s anything…..make sure you hear him say it….no matter how shy a man is……if his into you he will state it….although there are some of them who need a lil push…for e.g. The idea of a man about to loose a woman that he holds dear….would make him brace up and state his claim….if he doesn’t then he probably was never going to…. So why waste more time hanging around him.
4- When a guy starts hanging around you a lot without stating his intentions…..make it clear to him that you don’t spend that much time with people who are in the friend category…. And that your time is reserved for someone a lot more special. So it either he Admits he want to fill the position of the special man In Your life or he gets going.
5- A man who is into you does not need an excuse to see you; he would talk with you and come see you because he just can’t have a enough. No man is ever to busy for a woman he is crazy about….especially when you’re still at the wooing stage.
6- Realize your self worth! If so many women understood that they are nobody’s door mat and cannot and will not be treated as one ….there would be less broken hearts…..so many men have taken women for a ride because women do not have an idea of their self worth……..listen to the story of any happily married woman she would say something like “he treats me with respect”……”he treats me like a queen.” basically their husbands make them feel good with themselves……if your man makes you feel less than yourself and you let him, then honey you need to quickly do some self re-evaluation. KNOW YOUR WORTH!!!
7- And Lastly, but very important wait for God‘s instruction before you move him up from the friend category, because it’s is important that what you are about to start is God approved……I mean think of it why would you start a journey if you know that you are not going to get to your destination…….why would you give him your heart if he has no intentions of holding unto it for the rest of his life? Plus to hear God’s instruction in the first place you have to first be his friend…..don’t treat him like a D.O.G you would visit once in a while…..but like a G.O.D who longs for your companionship……..treat him the way you want that special person you’re waiting for to treat to you………my new phrase…..”If you’re about God’s work, God is going to be about YOU!
Note from Writer
Hi guys, I decided to put this out there because a lot of ladies have confided in me about nasty break ups, and then they move to throw themselves a pity party, next stop “SHE BECOMES A MAN HATER!” sigh!!! Agreed, we have some down right nasty brothers out there, but ladies, you can’t completely put the blame on their door step. I saw a phrase a while back it said “A man’s lack of commitment is because there is a lack of necessity to commit from the woman.” ladies you need to realize that you should require a man to state where your relationship is heading, because if you are in a relationship where you don’t know the direction, you can loose yourself and get hurt. Another issue worth mentioning … Ladies when a man says you guys are just friends he means you are just friend and nothing more. Quit having a relationship with him in your head; you’ll only hurt yourself. If you treat yourself as a prized being he’ll treat you accordingly; don’t leave your heart or body carelessly. Guard your heart, your time, your information. Don’t in your minds eye go ahead and put someone in your future that is not committed to you, that is just recipe for more heart breaks. So ladies its time to wise up, realize your worth, take responsibility for your wellbeing; and lastly, you attract people to you when you look like you are having a good time. So go out there and live LIFE!!!
YOUR WORDS HAVE POWER
The mouth is a dangerous weapon, which can work for or against you, depending on how it is used. Your mouth is not meant for eating alone it is also an instrument for charting the course of your life.
Words truly do have power. Have you ever noticed the response or reaction you receive when you say certain things? That’s because the words we use affect the outcome of the situation. They enrich us or they can cut us to the bone as if we were cut with a knife.
Even though we communicate in many different ways, through a look or a touch, a smile, or even the way we stand, our words are even more important. They not only express our views on the subject we’re presenting, they also represent who we are as an individual.
Speaking comes to most people as naturally as breathing. On many occasions our words are uttered without conscious thought; in fact we rarely stop and think about what we are saying. Thousands of words pour out of our mouths each day as our thoughts, opinions, judgements and beliefs are freely expressed. Often, however, we are oblivious to the positive or negative effect these words have on ourselves and the people around us.
Words have tremendous power. Words give out energy and a message which creates a reaction in others. Everything you say produces an effect in the world. Whatever you say to someone else will produce some kind of an effect in that person. We are constantly creating something, either positive or negative with our words.
“In the hands of a careful person words can work to do great good. But in d hands of a careless person,words can cause great harm.”
You should also note that, the reactions we get to our words often returns to us often in a multiplied form. If we’re angry our words can be forceful, rude, demeaning and hurtful. If we are happy our words can be joyful, happy, loving, and peaceful.That person’s response to the words we speak will be stronger because it will have the emotion created by the words attached to it. The power of words has a ripple effect in our life and those around us.
Recently I came across the work of Dr Emoto, and his studies on water crystals. He took samples of water, froze them and took photographs of the water crystals. He then wrote words on vials of water taken from the same source. The crystals formed in the vials which had positive words, such as love and gratitude, were beautiful. However the crystals in the vials with negative words such as hate and evil were very different and the water didn’t even form crystals in some instances. Experiments were done using words from different languages, and also by the scientists having no knowledge of what the words meant. The results were similar (see pictures below). The finding of this study on water crystals has had a profound impact on me. The human body is known to be composed of up to ninety percent water. If words had such a significant impact on water crystals, then what is the impact of positive and negative words to our bodies?
“The sound of your voice and the things you say are more important than you know.”
When we speak we use words to describe things, our mind creates the picture. When we hear the words of a song we do the same thing. Those words can either build us up or tear us down. They help create positive self esteem or break down our self esteem. Words encourage us to be our best or they rip away our self worth and trust in our abilities to reach goals and life’s ambitions.
An important key to success in life is to understand the power of words. A word is a thought eternalized. Our thoughts do have a great effect on us even though they are internal. What we think effects the way we live our life, it effects our emotions, our attitudes and our behaviour. A thought spoken, however, has even more power. It can never be taken back; it is out of our mouth and will have an effect. Our words have even more power than our thoughts because they not only affect ourselves, but the people and the world around us.
“You think being vulgar wit your words is cool, when in reality everyone loves a person who has encouraging or uplifting things to say.”
Successful people take control of their words, rather than letting their words control them. They are more conscious of their thoughts and words and the power they unleash. Successful people understand that they need to speak positively rather than negatively in order to see success. Successful people are characterized by the words that they speak. They know the importance of speaking words that will build self-esteem and confidence, build relationships and build possibilities. They speak words of affirmation, encouragement, love, acceptance and appreciation.
To see more personal success, the words that we speak need to be in alignment with what we want to see being produced in our life – our vision and our dreams. Your words can determine your destiny. Even more importantly, your words can make a positive difference on the people you interact with every day. Before you speak ask yourself: Is what I am about to say going to uplift the hearer? Will it inspire, motivate, and create forward momentum for them? Will it dissolve fear and create safety and trust? Will I create a positive or negative ripple effect by speaking out these words? Let‘s be determined to unleash the power of words for positive change.
It has been said that our eyes are windows to our soul and I believe that our words are also an indication of whom and what we are inside.
Words either give us hope or they bring despair. They are key to how we learn. From birth we are taught to communicate not only through touch, sight, and sound but through words.
Almost every emotion we feel as a human being is affected or created by the words we hear or say. Proverbs 13 verse 3 says that whoever guards his mouth preserves his life and he who opens his lips wide comes to ruin. So even in silence our words are powerful.
The very words we utter every day create the world we live in. They have THE to power to crush countries and the power to build nations anew.
Just for one day think about the words you use, think about the effect they have on you and the people around you. Use positive words instead of negative and see if the results you receive are different. I can bet you will be amazed.
“By your choice of words you can influence others in positive ways and as a result achieve peace and prosperity in your life.”
- The Power Of Words (workthedream.wordpress.com)
- My Version of the Law of Attraction (michaelluckman.wordpress.com)
- Creating Your Ripple Effect (igniteyourlifenow.wordpress.com)